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However, even if someone knows that shy people can mistakenly seem snobby in theory, it's still easy to get sucked into thinking it in practice.
If a guy approaches a girl, and she doesn't talk back to him much, he's likely to conclude she's just cold and rude and uninterested, and not consider the idea that she was paralyzed with nerves and didn't know what to say, or she was so anxious that she kept checking her cellphone to make him go away.
The Buddhist saying goes, “we are our thoughts and we become what we think.” If this is true, and our thoughts are driven by our words, and what we say informs how we eat, then maybe, just maybe, we really are what we eat.
While fine lines and wrinkles are an inevitable side effect of living a long and happy life, many people do not know that day-to-day choices can speed up the process, regardless of how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.
Similarly, if a girl is standing around a party and not talking to anyone, people will tend to assume she's unfriendly (unless she has a blatantly shy 'deer in the headlights' look on her face.) I think this view arises from a general belief that women are just more socially competent in general. Just that sometimes the default assumption is that women are naturally more comfortable in social situations, and so if they seem distant or untalkative it's because they're choosing to be that way.
Attractive shy women face this bias the most, since people sometimes have trouble conceiving that a physically good looking person could have any problems with their confidence.
"They looked at me in class for a tenth of a second today! " The points above are general shyness related obstacles that apply to both sexes in much the same way.
" (Cue melodramatic fantasies about getting married to them) "On Facebook they posted a You Tube video from a band I don't like. Below are the problems that shy women alone have to deal with: I put this one first to get it out of the way, since I think most people know about this concept.
Others pointed out how shy women have their own struggles as well.
I get too terrified and shut down when a guy I like is around." They may also have more generally negative opinions of themselves, like that they're boring, or that no one will like them because of how quiet and awkward they are, or that they're not very good looking.
Before we've had firsthand experience with the dating world women, and men, tend to have a naive, overly romantic view of what relationships and sex are like.
People may also be projecting their own fears and prejudices onto the behavior of shy good looking women ("She's hot, she'd never like a guy like me.
She's not laughing at my jokes because she's stuck up like all pretty girls", "She'd never want to be friends with me. She's like all those catty popular girls from high school.").
Instead I had to rely on my observations and research on what shy women go through.