The result is a film that is authentic, evokes laughter and tears, and inspires viewers toward something greater for our romantic culture.
Or take my most recent date, who showed me an 11-minute photo montage video, set to music, of his recently-deceased dog. Whereas before I’d have considered these dates a waste of time, now I see them as more than worthy of it — simply because I came away from them with a more expansive understanding of people and myself.Achieving this connection requires a willingness to be vulnerable, first and foremost, but also a commitment to enjoying or learning from the few hours you have with someone, honoring their most human traits, too — even if the romantic attraction or “spark” isn’t there.It’s about dating purely to find connection with others at any level, rather than dating specifically to find a partner.Kerry Cronin, who teaches philosophy at Boston College, where she is known as “the dating prof.” The assignment: to go on a “Level 1 date”—defined as no longer than 60 to 90 minutes, light, get-to-know-you conversation only, no alcohol or physical affection beyond an A-frame hug allowed (shoulders touch, not full body embrace), the invitation must use the word “date,” be in person, not over text, and whoever asks, pays. Cronin’s assignment has generated a fair bit of popularity on campus, and for good reasons.Cronin poignantly speaks to the unhappiness of most students concerning the hook-up culture and the loneliness and confusion it creates, while offering them a simple solution to their dating lives. Cronin told the Boston Globe, “and we need to teach our young people the virtue of social courage.
One took me through a novel of texts nearly every day, actively navigating her own role in them: How long should she wait to reply? We talked through everything exhaustively, all of us playing the role of wise expert to one another, but never getting it quite right ourselves.